Making muffins

A sweet older client of mine came in with one of her cats for his annual exam. Things were going rather smoothly and routine until near the end of the visit when I reached over to give Crabby his Rabies vaccine while he was precariously close to his mom.

"Hey now, make sure you don't poke that thing into one of my breasts!! No seriously, they're fake and I was told they could rupture any minute. I got these back in the early days when they just put silicone under your skin. They're a little bigger than I wanted so now I'm always worried that something will happen to one of them. Heck, even when the cats go to make muffins on me in bed I worry their claws will pop them just like that, BANG!! I can see that you think I'm joking, but I'm not."

Mexican food has the same effect on me...

"So what brand of food do you buy for Fluffy?"

"I think it's called Nitro."

"Wow, that's pretty explosive stuff."

"I'm sorry, I don't understand. Is there something wrong with it?"

"What? Oh, no no, I was just joking. You see, the name is actually......ummm, nevermind."

(sigh...)